O Violent Night

Christmas. The birth of our Savior. C.S. Lewis referred to it as "The Great Invasion." In chapter 7 of Mere Christianity Lewis writes:

One of the things that surprised me when I first read the New Testament seriously was that it talked so much about a Dark Power in the universe--a mighty evil spirit who was held to be the Power behind death and disease, and sin.... Christianity agrees... that this universe is at war. But it does not think this is a war between independent powers. It thinks it is a civil war, a rebellion, and that we are living in a part of the universe occupied by the rebel.

Enemy-occupied territory--that is what this world is. Christianity is the story of how the rightful king has landed, you might say landed in disguise, and is calling us all to take part in a great campaign of sabotage. When you go to church you are really listening-in to the secret wireless from our friends: that is why the enemy is so anxious to prevent us from going. He does it by playing on our conceit and laziness and intellectual snobbery. I know someone will ask me, 'Do you really mean, at this time of day, to re-introduce our old friend the devil-hoofs and horns and all?' Well, what the time of day has to do with it I do not know. And I am not particular about the hoofs and horns. But in other respects my answer is 'Yes, I do.' I do not claim to know anything about his personal appearance. If anybody really wants to know him better I would say to that person, 'Don't worry. If you really want to, you will. Whether you'll like it when you do is another question.'

Compare that with the most a-cultural telling of Christmas, as found in Revelation 12:1-7. We read:

"A great and wondrous sign appeared in heaven: a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet and a crown of twelve stars on her head. She was pregnant and cried out in pain as she was about to give birth. Then another sign appeared in heaven: an enormous red dragon with seven heads and ten horns and seven crowns on his heads. His tail swept a third of the stars out of the sky and flung them to the earth. The dragon stood in front of the woman who was about to give birth, so that he might devour her child the moment it was born. She gave birth to a son, a male child, who will rule all the nations with an iron scepter. And her child was snatched up to God and to his throne. The woman fled into the desert to a place prepared for her by God, where she might be taken care of for 1,260 days.


And there was war in heaven."

Robert Mounce says that: 1) the "woman" here is not Mary, but the messianic community, the "ideal Israel"; 2) out of the messianic community is born a "child," a Messiah; 3) the seven-headed red dragon is Satan (Rev. 12:9; 20:2); 4) Satan is looking to devour this child; AKA Jesus the Christ.

Mary has already been prophetically warned about such things. In Luke 2 we read that...

...the old man "Simeon took him [baby Jesus] in his arms and praised God, saying: "Sovereign Lord, as you have promised, you now dismiss your servant in peace. For my eyes have seen your salvation, which you have prepared in the sight of all people, a light for revelation to the Gentiles and for glory to your people Israel." The child's father and mother marveled at what was said about him. Then Simeon blessed them and said to Mary, his mother: "This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be spoken against, so that the thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your own soul too."

Violent night
Holy night
All's not calm
All's not bright
Round yon Virgin Mother and Child
Holy Infant so tender and mild
Begins the Heavenly War
Oh win us our Heavenly War

Christmas Eve - that violent night when the Light of the World descended into darkness...

The Obedience of Desperation

(2 Kings 5, Elisha and Naaman)
The Power of Desperation, Michael Catt

• "The Bible recognizes no faith that does not lead to obedience, nor does it recognize any obedience that does not spring from faith. The two are opposite sides of the same coin." - A. W. Tozer
  
  
• ... no one gets to God on their own. While we do come to Christ alone by grace alone through faith alone, we are, in reality, in need of others to show us the way.
  
  
• God's chain to Naaman:
  * The Little Jewish Maid
  * Naaman's Master
  * The King of Syria
  * The King of Israel
  * Elisha
  * Elisha's Messenger
  * Naaman's Servants
  
  Never underestimate the important role you might play in the life of another person... When people are desperate and dying, it is no time for believers to be fearful of what others might think.
  
  
• We struggle with trust and resist the call to obey. We stand outside the door of deliverance and demand that God come out and meet us on our terms. We expect Him to recognize us even when we fail to recognize Him as sovereign and sufficient.
  
  
• The purpose and timing of God constitute the fuel of victory in the Christian life. And the spark that ignites it, releasing it as a practical and powerful force in the life, is OBEDIENCE. God's power flows in the stream of obedience.
  
  
• You believe only as much of the Bible as you are obeying! What you don't obey, you don't believe.
  
  
• If we are reluctant to give unquestioning obedience to God, it is because we don't really trust Him. If obedience comes from trust, where does trust come from? The answer is--knowledge. You won't obey someone you don't trust. You can't trust someone you don't know. So here is the spiritual equation for obedience: knowledge of God equals faith in God equals obedience to God.
  
  
• This, you see, is evil questioning [referring to Naaman's response to Elisha]. What business of Naaman's was it whether there was any medicinal powers in the water or not? Whether Abanah and Pharpar were better or worse than Jordan? He need have nothing to do but with the simple command: "Go, wash in the Jordan seven times, and you will be clean." 'Twas his to obey, not to question. 'Twas his to fulfill the command, not to enquire into its philosophy.
  
  
• Common sense can kill faith. Reasoning and questioning the Word and will of God will destroy faith and justify disobedience. There's a difference between common sense and coming to your senses. You begin to understand God's ways are not your ways. He doesn't have to explain Himself.
  
  
• When Godly people speak into your life: listen; confirm their words with the Word of God; don't try to bargain with God; don't delay!
  

~

Fill My Cup, Lord

(1 Kings 4:1-7, Elisha and the widow)
The Power of Desperation, Michael Catt

• "We will never crave to be filled until we are convinced we are empty." - John Blanchard
  
  
• Hindrances to being filled with the Holy Spirit:
  
  
  * Too much confidence in your own ability to function without help, coupled with a lack of appreciation for what the Spirit can and will do.
  * Being resistant to repentance.
  * When you cannot or will not take God at His Word.
  
  
  
  
• PUSH - Pray Until Something Happens
  
  
• Take God at His Word. Don't negotiate or try to figure it out. Have the attitude of the mother of Jesus who said to those at the wedding feast, "Do whatever He tells you." (John 2:5) End of discussion and the beginning of blessings.
  
  
• Desperate people obey willingly!
  

Additional scriptures to read: Ephesians 3:17-19, 5:15-18; 2 Corinthians 7:1; Romans 10:17; James 2:26.

Also, see this post for more on the story of Elisha and the desperate widow.

The Sufficiency and Supply of God in the Wilderness

(Deuteronomy 8, Moses and the Children of Israel)
The Power of Desperation, Michael Catt.

• "The grace, the groans and the glory are all part of the eternal purpose. Where there is no groaning, there is no growing now, nor glory to come." - Vance Havner
  
  
• The thought of God taking forty years to work something in us - and out of us - is frightening. Especially in our American Christianity mindset of immediate success and power.
  
  
• What might the books of the real heroes of the Bible be entitled?
  Job - "Serving God when there's nothing left."
  Moses - "How to go from the palace to the desert in one fateful decision."
  Noah - "Don't build a boat where there's no water, unless you are willing to be the brunt of the world's jokes."
  
  
• "The Wilderness is an experience of contrasts. It is an unsettled, barren, perilous area, but it is also a place where God is! It is a difficult, lonely, unnerving site, but it is also a place where God dwells! It is a draining, exhausting, discouraging situation, but it is also a place where God heals and strengthens! It is a removed, desolate, debilitating condition, but it is also a place where God moves and loves!" - Rob Bailey
  
  
• God puts us in the wilderness until we want the Promised Land enough to fight for it.
  
  
• The wilderness is NEVER wasted time.
  
  
• The wilderness is a time when you can make a choice: I'm going to live through this and thrive in the wilderness, or I'm going to curl up in the fetal position and just wait to die.
  
  
• Moses got a B.N. degree (Be Nothing) in the seminary of suffering and sheepherding. Faith works best when there is no natural hope. God speaks best when all other voices are silenced.
  
  
• "Remember is is the very time for faith to work when sight ceases. The greater the difficulty, the easier for faith; as long as there remains certain natural prospects, faith does not get on as easily." - George Mueller
  
  
• Our strengths are no help to God, and our weaknesses are no hindrance to Him.
  
  
• God is not looking for a rededication of your life. God is looking for admission, confession, surrender, and obedience. What He wants is not rededication of our flesh to be better. He wants repentance from the sin that so easily besets us. We should ask God to put a thorn in every pleasure and a worm in every desire that would prevent us from being wholly committed to the Lordship of Christ.
  

Additional scriptures to read: Psalms 119; Jeremiah 17; Romans 7; Psalms 63 (1 Samuel 15-19); Psalms 84; Psalms 143; Matthew 5.

~~~~~~~~~~

Even if God were to intervene this very minute and deliver me, fulfill my desire... it would not be the end. Other troubles just as pressing, likely more pressing, will come. I desire to grow in Christ, and growth comes through trial, groaning, and necessity of faith. If I am to forever chase God, then I am to forever be tried. I must learn to bring joy with me to the wilderness and be sustained - to thrive in the desert - by God's presence alone.

The Way Up is Down

Tonight I am beginning the book: The Power of Desperation by Michael Catt. Why? One, because I was sitting at my desk when my spirit suddenly said, "Hey Craig, go read that book you've had on your shelf for over a year," and two, because my heart yearns for love and my spirit cries out for more of God and His power. I want [to learn] to be desperate and broken, completely weak and surrendered, while still holding unwaveringly to faith in God's deliverance. I don't know how to do that, but God will not ignore a cry for wisdom. The Joy of the Lord is my strength.

I'm making notes in my prayer journal as I read a chapter each day. I will post some of the more meaningful ones here, most likely without personal comment. They speak for themselves.

Chapter One - The Way Up is Down (Genesis 32-35, Jacob)

• "God cannot bless us until He has us. When we try to keep within us an area that is our own, we try to keep an area of death. Therefore, in love, He claims all. There's no bargaining with Him." - C. S. Lewis
  
  
• You are wallowing in defeat because you keep trying harder instead of trusting completely.
  
  
• "I want to be the person he can turn to and know he is loved unconditionally. I don't approve of what he's done. I don't applaud it. But someone has to love him, and it might as well be me."
  
  
• We will never be desperate for God if we blame our environment, our education or lack thereof, our surroundings, our parents, or our circumstances. We will never be desperate until we face our own depravity. Sin deceives us into thinking we can negotiate with God. It deludes us into thinking we can get better in our flesh. It destroys us by telling us we can get to heaven but avoid a face-to-face encounter with the Christ who demands our whole life surrendered to Him.
  
  
• The blessing can't come without the wrestling. If there is no willingness to yield, there will never be willingness for God to rule.
  
  
• Jacob, like many of us, knew the promise of the blessing, but he couldn't see how God was going to do it. He was impatient with God's timetable. He must have been convinced the promise was conditional based on something he could do, rather than unconditional based on the wisdom, grace, and love of God.
  
  
• Jacob's actions reveal his inability to trust God with his life. He fell back into his old thought patterns.
  
  
• God wrestles with us for two reasons: to get us to admit our deception, and to reveal what we can be when we are desperate for Him as our source of sufficiency.
  

A Bored vs. Meaningful Life

I have a family member who loves to work in his large vegetable and flower garden. He talks about needing "garden time." I would say that is his "therapy." Working, laboring, for a purpose can bring great inner satisfaction. To work on a job worth doing is to achieve a job well done. Just the sheer physicality of hard work produces job satisfaction. From my Jesus-theistic standpoint, to work at a task God calls me to brings great emotional and spiritual fulfillment.

For me this applies to even small, seemingly insignificant tasks. For example, whenever I arrive at a friend's home and see dishes that need to be done, or trash that needs to be taken out, I'm finding that I'm beginning to love doing the dishes or carrying a trash across a parking lot. The purpose for me is: this will bless my friends. It is one thing they will not have to do. It is a way to show them that I love them. To work with a purpose is to co-labor with God and His purposes. That is not only good, but therapy for the soul. I want to come to the end of my life knowing God has worked through me to accomplish His desires.

This doesn't have to apply only to "good deeds." Colossians 3 tell us, "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him... Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving."

To labor with no sense of purpose is a kind of hell. It is boredom. "Boredom" is not having nothing to do; boredom is finding no meaning in what you are doing. Purposeless work produces inner agitation. It is "a useless and ill-directed action of the body." Yuck! I continue to meet many people who live purposeless lives and thus experience a constant back-and-forth movement in their disquieted spirit. What should one do?

What Thomas Merton writes is helpful here. Merton says:

“Work occupies the body and the mind and is necessary for the health of the spirit. Work can help us to pray and be recollected, if we work properly. Agitation, however, destroys the spiritual usefulness of work and even tends to frustrate its physical and social purpose. Agitation is the useless and ill-directed action of the body. It expresses the inner confusion of a soul without peace.

Work brings peace to the soul that has a semblance of order and spiritual understanding. Agitation -- a condition of spirit that is quite normal in the world of business -- is the fruit of tension in a spirit that is turning dizzily from one stimulus to another and trying to react to fifteen different appeals at the same time. Under the surface of agitation, and furnishing it with its monstrous and inexhaustible drive, is the force of fear or elemental greed for money, or pleasure, or power. The more complex a man’s passion, the more complex his agitation.

All this is the death of the interior life. Occasional church-going and the recitation of hasty prayers have no power to cleanse this purulent wound.” (No Man Is an Island, 114-115)

Merton says that to work for the goals of money, pleasure, or power is to cultivate the agitated heart. It brings "the death of the interior life." The antidote to this is: dwell, now, in Christ. (See John 14-16) Abide in Jesus. Let Him shepherd your soul. A little bit of churchgoing won't help. Constant abiding will. Out of this Christ-dwelling comes not only His peace and joy but our life purpose.

The Needy

I have been drawing today. I enjoy drawing, especially when it is for other's enjoyment. Naturally, I am my own worst critic. I have been doing art-related activities for as long as I can remember. I've painted pictures of mountain landscapes, sketched epic battles between dragons and knights, and colored portraits of friends and famous folk. I've hand-crafted pottery filled with snakes or the blood of Jesus and woven tapestries that now hang on my wall. I've practiced thousands of hours and generally feel pretty good with what I can accomplish visually when I set my mind to it. But I cannot create pieces of art like my parents. Their sculptures and drawings put me in awe. As I look at their work, I cannot help but think, "I am a man of unclean artistic ability." I am in need.

So are you. We’re all a bunch of very needy people. My fellow artist and poet David once wrote, “Yet I am poor and needy; may the Lord think of me. You are my help and my deliverer; O my God, do not delay.” We all need guidance. We all need direction. We all need help in this life. It is a good thing to recognize one’s neediness, for this realization puts one in position to be guided, directed, and helped. Only the needy know they need a shepherd. Only those who realize their need for guidance can be guided.

In a moment of God-inspired musical genius David wrote the first line to arguably the greatest worship song ever written. Out of his neediness David wrote, “The Lord is my shepherd.” All of David’s own talents were not enough. As brilliant as King David was, his own intelligence did not suffice. As courageous as he was, he still struggled with fear. David, the greatest King and leader Israel ever had, knew that he needed himself to be led. He needed a shepherd. And for that, David chose well.

A minister I firmly respect runs a seminary. In his class on spiritual formation he sends his students out for times of prayer, using Psalm 23 as their meditative focus. He instructs them: “When God speaks to you, write it down.” According to him, his experience is that God doesn’t let 40% of them get past verse 1. God asks them the question: “Am I really your shepherd?” That is the foundational question for all spiritual formation, transformation, renewal, and restoration. The answer to that question determines whether a person’s life and ministry will be authentic or inauthentic, relevant or irrelevant. This is because unless the Lord builds the house, we labor in vain; unless we are shepherded by God, we’re shepherded by some other god (like self; others; money; sex; power). The key question of the spiritual life is, as Henri Nouwen said: Who do you belong to?

The necessary precondition for authentic, relevant God-leadership is: being-led. To lead is to be led. To be led one must heart-recognize one’s great neediness. This is, spiritually, a very good place to be. How do we come to understand this?

I don’t think you can force this idea on people. I believe that the heart-recognition of personal neediness is given to people as a revelation. You cannot command this for other people. You cannot even teach or explain it effectively. It’s a revelation, a wakeup call, that God desires us all to have, but which all do not see. If one consistently abides in God’s presence, God Himself will show you this. It will be like me, admiring my latest sketch, thinking I’ve got my artistic creativity in a powerful place, watching my dad pick up a pen and begin to work, and then comes the revelation of personal artistic-neediness. If I was thinking that I didn’t need more ability and practice to draw like that, that I didn’t need help and shepherding to draw like that, such a thought has been, like a bubble, burst.

In the spiritual life neediness is cool, self-reliance sucks. If I really wanted to draw like my parents I’d need my parents to shepherd me individually. If I really want to be used by God I need to be constantly shepherded by God on a personal levl. Pray for a revelation of personal neediness. God wants to reveal this to you. He will, as you spend time with him.

Your spiritual life and effectiveness for the sake of God and His Kingdom is at stake.

Heartfelt Interlude Between Real Posts

Am I at the point of no improvement?
What of the depths that I still dwell in?
I try to excel, but I feel no movement.
Can I be free of this unreleasable sin?

Never underestimate my Jesus.
You're telling me that there's no hope;
I'm telling you, you're wrong.

Never underestimate my Jesus.
When the world around you crumbles,
He will be strong. He will be strong.

I throw up my hands: "Oh, the impossibilities!"
Frustrated and tired, where do I go from here?
Now I'm searching for the confidence I've lost so willingly.
Overcoming these obstacles is overcoming my fears.

Never underestimate my Jesus.
You're telling me that there's no hope;
I'm telling you, you're wrong.

Never underestimate my Jesus.
When the world around you crumbles,
He will be strong. He will be strong.

I think I can't! I think I can't!
But I think You can, I think You can....

Gather my insufficiencies and place them in Your hands.
Place them in Your hands. Place them in Your hands....

Never underestimate my Jesus.
You're telling me that there's no hope;
I'm telling you: you're wrong!

Never underestimate my Jesus.
When the world around you crumbles,
He will be strong. He will be strong.

Praises in the Storm?

If you've been a Christian any time at all, you've no doubt heard or even personally been told at some point that we are to praise God in periods of blessing, and praise God in periods of tribulation. It goes back to loving God regardless of the situation, and believing in Him.

When you go through the rough patches, though, do you know what to praise God for? I've asked myself that before. It wasn't doubt in God's power that made me ask - it was just simple logistics. When nothing in the world around me is giving me reason to be thankful, and it feels like God is off away somewhere preparing things for "some day" when He's going to answer, what do you have to praise Him for right then? You could "count your blessings," and name what God's done for you in the past. I've done that, but it's never made me feel all that appreciative at the time. I was just doing it because I knew I was supposed to. You could thank Him for the answer you know He's going to give eventually, but if you have no idea in what form that answer's going to come, it still feels hollow, at least to me. I mean, we should thank Him for future deliverance, but I really want something I can be thankful for in the here and now, when I'm in a valley. What does God have for me that's so great then?

I'm writing tonight about something you can tangibly see (in a way) during the rough times, something you can hold onto (surprisingly) and say, "Thank you, Lord, for THIS."

Let me back up a second. Right now, I'm in one of the worst places I've ever been. I think I say that each time I go through a trial, and I think each time, it's true. By walking through one valley of the shadow of death, God grants you new strengths to walk through the next, harder one - one you would not have been able to get through had you not first gone through the other. Some of you readers may know a portion of the tribulation around me, some of you may know nothing of any of it. Essentially, though, I'm being attacked on all sides. It honestly feels like everywhere I look, I see frustration, failure, and heartbreak. In my living arrangements, in my school, in my work, in my finances, in my friendships, in my relationships (or lack thereof), in my car, in my physical health, everywhere - literally NOTHING is going my way right now. It makes me want to throw my head up and just scream, "Do you even have anything left to throw at me, Satan? Do you think You might want to step in here sometime, God?!"

I feel battered. And exhausted. And utterly lost and alone. I'm almost afraid to attempt anything right now because the way things have been going, it will either fall away into nothing or worse, blow up in my face.

But this is not a pity party. This is a praise report.

The bigger the giants in your life, the fiercer the winds and waves, the higher the stone walls, the darker your night is... the better the opportunity for God to shine. Remember, our lives are about bringing glory to God. When everything else is stripped away, that is the purpose of our lives. The fires that we go through do exactly that - they strip everything else away, so that we realize only a miracle - only God - can save us; and when He does, we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was Him who delivered us, not our own workings or the workings of the world.

In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith – of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire – may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. I Peter 1:6-7

Earlier I told you that during those tribulations, you actually have something you can hold to and say thank you for, remember? I was referring to the tribulations themselves. Yeah, it sounds crazy, but we need to look at tribulations in the right way. The more tribulations that come against us, the deeper into crap that we fall... how much more will God deliver us out of those? If you're sitting high and easy on a mountain of blessings, praise God! But where do you have to go from there? Why do we go through hell in this life? To give us the opportunity to rely on God, and to give God the opportunity to wow the world with His deliverance. When you're lying beaten at the bottom of a valley, staring up at the cold, dark walls all around you, praise God! Where do you have to go from there? Up! The farther down you go, the stronger and more magnificent the day of deliverance will be!

But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

When we as Christians encounter periods of drought and have to walk through hell, we should count each one a blessing from God because each one of those are ways in which God is going to shine in our lives! We can be thankful FOR THE TRIALS because they are EVIDENCE that God is bringing abundance and relief! That is when He is strongest in our lives! The devil wants to throw evil at us to break us down, but we can turn it around on him! We can give thanks for that evil that comes against us because we see it as opportunity for our Savior to prove Himself to us and to the world that watches us!

Jesus said, “Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.” Luke 22:31-32

So the next time you are broken by the conditions of the world in your life, choose to stand up and say, "Thank you for this, Jesus! Thank you for trusting me with this trial, with this opportunity to shine with Your light and to bring glory to Your Name! Thank you for delivering me in a mighty way, in such a way that all those around me will marvel and bring praise to You!"

God will deliver you. You know that. He promises to do so - see Romans 8:18, 28, 16:20; Deuteronomy 31:8; Psalm 34:4, 10, 17; Malachi 3:10; Jeremiah 29:11; Lamentations 3:31-32; Micah 7:8; Luke 12:6-7; 2 Corinthians 4:16-18; 1 Peter 5:7-10; 1 John 5:4-5; the list goes on and on!

When you need something, anything, to praise God for, you now know where to look - in the last place the devil expects you or wants you to. Because when you get to the place where you can honestly praise God in the storm, that's when your faith flourishes and that is when the giants fall, the waves die down, the walls crumble, the darkness flees, and when God is glorified! When you are disheartened and think the enemy is winning in your life, remember these sage words of C. S. Lewis and follow them - your victory is just around the next bend!

‎[The enemy's] cause is never in more danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do [the Father's] will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of Him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken... and still obeys. - C. S. Lewis, the Screwtape Letters

He Promises to Deliver His People

So I have come down to deliver them out of the hand of the Egyptians, and to bring them up form that land to a good and large land, to a land flowing with milk and honey... (Exodus 3:8)

The children of Israel had been delivered from Egypt and wandered in the desert for 40 years before entering the land God had promised them.

But as soon as year number 41 came, the wandering was over for good. They entered into the land of milk and honey! Maybe it seems that you are in a desert period of your life. Maybe you feel like you've been stumbling around for 40 years. Don't worry, number 41 is on its way!

Look at these examples: Noah and his family were on the ark while it rained for 40 days and 40 nights—41 came, and the rain stopped. For 40 days Goliath showed up every morning and taunted Israel—41 came, and David slew him!

God has promised to bring you out of your Egypt as well—if you will hold on to your faith in Him. Whatever situation you are going through right now, don't give up. God is on your side! So if it seems like trouble has been raining down on you, don't worry because 41 is on the way. The rain is going to stop. Whatever giant is in your life, 41 is coming and that giant's coming down! You are more than a conqueror through Christ Jesus (see Romans 8:37). He will deliver you out of Egypt.

See for yourself: Genesis 7, 8; Samuel 17; Psalm 34:17, 19.

You of Little Faith

During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw Him walking on the lake, they were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear. But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."

"Lord, if it is you," Peter replied, "Tell me to come to you on the water."

"Come," He said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!"

Immediately Jesus reached out His hand and caught him. "You of little faith," He said, "Why did you doubt?"

And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down.

(Matthew 14:25-32)

One thing that I love about the Bible is that, with the help of the Holy Spirit, scriptures that you have read a thousand times can take on new meaning to speak directly into your life for the situation you are currently in. So it was with this passage.

In the story as told in Mark, it says that Jesus saw the disciples struggling with their boat because "the wind was against them." Their journey was not going well for them, but they were trying hard to do as Jesus commanded and "go on across the lake ahead of Him." Jesus walked out to them and gave them direction, but they were afraid.

A week ago today, Jesus walked out on the water in front of me. He had commanded me to walk down a certain path, assuring me He'd meet me on the other side, and I was struggling to obey. I knew the command, and I knew I'd get through it somehow, so I was certainly not expecting Jesus to show up and change my plans. When He did arrive, I was scared. My response to His direction was, "No! That can't be Jesus! If I do that, it will ruin everything!" I didn't recognize Jesus - I saw a ghost.

But Jesus answered and said, "Take courage! It is I. Do not be afraid, Craig." I was still doubtful, but I wanted to do God's will, so I cried out, "If that is you, Lord, confirm it for me. Tell me to come to you directly." And much to my displeasure, Jesus said, "Come." He called me out. If I was going to be obedient, I had to get out of the boat, leave my comfort zone, step out where it seemed like I would immediately sink. It was a suicide mission, if God didn't save the day.

I got out of the boat. I acted in a very bold manner. I gave my first kiss. I walked toward Jesus and, amazingly, didn't sink. At least not right away. Pretty soon after (within 24 hours), the winds came against me, and I started looking at them rather than at Jesus. The winds came from an unexpected source, accusing me of not hearing from God, of being unable to hear from God and needing to "seriously revaluate my relationship with Him" because I was wrong. I faltered. I started doubting myself, my ability to hear God, and I sank quick. Jesus was still speaking to me while those words were being said, but the waves were too loud for me to hear.

I went home following that conversation, not knowing what to do or where I was at, and all I could say was, "Lord, save me! I know You have Your hand in my life, in both of our lives. I thank You for loving me. I need direction now; please, save me." Then I went to sleep.

The next day, God gave me the above scriptures, and I realized where I was. I really had followed Jesus and stepped out of the boat. I was on top of the water, not drowning in it. Jesus immediately reached down and grabbed my hand, pulling me back up the moment my faith began to die. The storm was (is) still raging all around me, with no sign of letting up, but I have peace in the storm, safe in His arms.

Now I have to walk back to the boat. That was the final step for Peter - even though he had faltered, and Jesus had saved him, he still had to get back to the boat for the storm to die down. He had to hold Jesus's hand and go a little bit further across the surface of the tossing waves. I have to do the same. Jesus's words to me where two-fold: "You of little faith. Why do you doubt Me, Craig? You knew it was going to get worse before it got better. I told you that, even if you didn't want to hear it. But you obeyed, and that is all I ask of you. Now come here, rest in My arms, give Me your burdened heart, and let Me take it from here. You keep believing, and this storm will pass. That means you have to back off - you have to respect her wishes. It is between her and I now. I changed your heart in this; do you doubt I can do it again?"

Peace that passes all understanding. Even though the storms of love and life rage all around me, I am safe in His hands. Now my prayers need to take a different direction - it isn't my heart that is about to be tossed to and fro. Thank you, Lord, for providing for me; now please turn Your attention - and my attention - outward. We'll walk this together, and end up with a beautiful day out of sea soon enough.

I don't think anybody really reads this blog, but if you do, I want to encourage you to spend time in prayer, letting God know precisely how you feel and what you want. As you unburden yourself, you'll find peace, and in that peace, you'll be quieted enough to hear God's still, small voice of direction. When you do, no matter how crazy the direction seems, follow it. It may not make the storm go away immediately, but Jesus will be there save you, even if you falter once you start. All He asks for is obedience, that first step. And once the two of you get back to the boat, your answer will come. But none of it happens if you don't step out of the boat and onto the crashing waves in the first place.

Crashing Those Pity Parties

In Luke 9:23 Jesus tells us, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” Self-denial is necessary to take up the cross and follow Jesus. It needs to be done every day. To me the self-denial part involves a deconstruction of negative aspects of the self. Like self-love, self-hatred, and self-pity. All are forms of self-obsession, and the more self-obsession one has the less following of Jesus there will be. The following of Jesus is in inverse proportion to self-obsession.

Self-pity is one of the more punishing kinds of self-obsession. Self-pity cannot coexist with spiritual renewal and transformation. Unfortunately, I could write a book and call it How To Host Your Next Pity Party.

To be self-pitying is to live life as a victim. While it’s true that sometimes we are victims, I think there is a spirit of victimization (self-deprivation) that is to be distinguished from the real thing. It looks like this. More than once the words have come into my mind, "Poor me! They are not treating me right - and after all I've done for them!" Sometimes I even replace "they" and "them" with "God" and "Jesus" in my pity-parties, feeling short-changed by my Creator. Personal deprivation and even mistreatment lead to the emotion of anger.

In this regard Henri Nouwen asks, "What else is anger but the response to the sense of being deprived? Much of my own anger comes from the fact that my self feels deprived." When one chooses to express this anger by hosting a pity party the self-obsession has begun.

One then becomes like Tolstoy’s character Ivan Ilyich, of whom it was said that “no one pitied Ivan the way he wished to be pitied.” If you’re at all familiar with self-pity read this section from Tolstoy and relate:

"What tormented Ivan Ilych most was the deception, the lie, which for some reason they all accepted, that he was not dying but was simply ill, and the only need keep quiet and undergo a treatment and then something very good would result… The awful, terrible act of his dying was, he could see, reduced by those about him to the level of a casual, unpleasant, and almost indecorous incident (as if someone entered a drawing room defusing an unpleasant odour) and this was done by that very decorum which he had served all his life long. He saw that no one felt for him, because no one even wished to grasp his position… [W]hat most tormented Ivan Ilych was that no one pitied him as he wished to be pitied. At certain moments after prolonged suffering he wished most of all (though he would have been ashamed to confess it) for someone to pity him as a sick child is pitied. He longed to be petted and comforted.”

When you hold a “pity party” and invite yourself and others to it, the focus is on you. It’s all about how you have been hurt, how you have been mistreated, and how you have been wronged. The ruling emotion of pity is bitterness. But one can’t be at the same time bitter and fulfilling the Great Commandment to love God with all your heart. Self-pity seems to be the opposite of renewal and transformation of the heart. For an unfortunate example of the spirit of victimization consider this:

In 1978 Dan White, a former San Francisco city supervisor who had recently resigned his position, entered San Francisco City Hall through a basement window, went upstairs, and shot and killed Mayor George Moscone and Supervisor Harvey Milk. Psychiatrist Martin Blinder testified in court that White had been depressed, which led to eating junk food: Twinkies and Coca-Cola. This further deepened White's depression, since he was an ex-athlete and knew that the food was not good for him. White’s legal defense was that this junk-food-induced depression prompted his murder spree. This celebrated diagnosis became known as the "Twinkie defense." We were supposed to have pity on him because the Twinkies made him do it!

Someone who holds “pity parties” refuses to take responsibility for their own behavior and blames others. Self-pity leads to a “victim mentality.” Therefore self-pity needs to be denied, because it keeps us from being fulfilled in Jesus. To experience renewal and transformation be free from giving the “Twinkie Defense.” Experience God as your Defender. Do this by daily being like a branch attached to Jesus the true Vine, gaining your sustenance from Him.

Soul-Searching

I am going soul-searching. I am deliberately taking time out of my life to just spend time with God. To just get to know Him. There are people in this world who I care deeply for, and this makes me want to just be with them. We don't have to talk or play games or anything for me to be content; I simply enjoy their presence. I love Jesus. I care for Him deeply. I want to just spend time with Him, not telling Him all of my concerns, not finding ways to do His work... just enjoying His presence. The rest of it - my concerns, my calling, His work - will be taken care of if I pursue this simple loving relationship first and foremost. My flesh struggles against this. It seems very foreign to me. I think C. S. Lewis summed up why I resist so strongly the idea of just spending time in solitude alone with God:

"The natural life knows that if the spiritual life gets hold of it, all its self-centredness and self-will are going to be killed and it is ready to fight tooth and nail to avoid that."

Solitude with God inevitably leads to the spiritual life getting hold of my natural, selfish life. That part of me is going to die. That's a scary thought, really - there are things that I WANT and that I do NOT WANT to give up. The truth is, my heart is restless. I don't like what God is telling me. I hate it. I want nothing to do with it. I don't want to hurt, or to long, or to be lonely. I want answers now. I want results now. But that's the natural, fighting tooth and nail. My spirit knows it is in my best interest to give way to God's transformation, whether I "like" it or not. And, deep down, in a still, small voice, I know that what I REALLY want is for all of this bad, nasty, heavy, oppressive emotion to go away, to be replaced by steadfast hope and love in my Savior. But I have to let parts of me die first. And that requires slow-cooking in God's presence. I need solitude with God.

As I walk this path, more instructive posts will follow most likely. I want to share what God reveals to me, in hopes my pain and time-spent will be of help to you and save you that pain and time. That being said, I cannot encourage you enough to start deliberately taking time out to be alone with God. Not a little time, either - hours. A full day. A weekend.

You will fall in love with Him, and your life will never be the same. You cannot avoid being changed after spending time in God's presence. That's what He does. Trust me.

The "Game with Minutes"

The Game with Minutes was designed by missionary Frank Laubach. It is mentioned in Greg Boyd's Present Perfect.

The game's challenge is this: try to bring Christ to mind at least one second of each and every minute within a designated hour. Laubach suggests choosing "an uncomplicated hour" to do this. Boyd writes: "The basic idea is that we need to become accustomed to remembering Christ when our mind has little to do before we can learn how to remember Christ with any consistency in situations that require more attention." (38)

Playing a game like this can be used by God to overcome the secular mentality deep within us. When we are brainwashed by the secular worldview "we habitually exclude [God] from our awareness. Because of this we go about our day-to-day lives as functional atheists... So thoroughly are we brainwashed by the secular mind-set that the very suggestion that we could routinely experience the world in a way that includes God strikes us as impossible." (29)

If we were like branches continually connected to Jesus the True Vine then Laubach's "game" would be silly. It would be like saying "Let's play a game where we breathe every few seconds." Or: "Let's play a game and pretend the Pope is Catholic." In other words we wouldn't need to play Laubach's game since we'd be fully God-connected 24/7. But is that possible? Boyd, following in the footsteps of many Jesus-followers before him, thinks it is, or is at least approachable. The reason is: constant God-awareness is the normal Christian life.

Rather than wait for special God-moments to come, God is present in every moment, in every "now." Because God is present now and in every moment, we can surrender ourselves in every moment to God. We don't have to wait for special worship services to do this. Indeed, to wait for the next worship service to come around shows that we're living more in the prevailing secular world than in the Kingdom of God.

Boyd writes: "As foreign as it is to contemporary Western Christianity, and as impossible as it may seem to many contemporary Christians, practicing the presence of God lies at the foundation of "mere Christianity."" (37) And: "Branches don't visit a vine once in a while on special occasions. Rather, branches are permanently attached to their source of life. So too, followers of Jesus are to take up permanent residence in Christ, remaining attached to him at all times as their source of their Life." (34)

This challenge can only be met one moment at a time:

Right now is the time to surrender.
Right now is the time to seek first the Kingdom of God.
Right now is the time to remain in Christ.
Right now is the time to live in the Spirit.
Right now is the time to pray.
Right now is the time to take every moment captive.

As Jesus taught, tomorrow will worry about itself. (Matthew 6:34; cf. Boyd, 37)

More on God and Time

Here is a bit of what I've been reading on time and eternity, so you all can know where I'm coming from. This is an excerpt by C. S. Lewis in Mere Christianity. I'm actually pulling from a lot of sources, but Lewis is an old one that's been in the back of my mind throughout. I'm giving it in full, and I'll comment on it tomorrow - I don't want to throw too much at you at once, and its long enough by itself. (Also, feel free to take the advice offered in the first two sentences below - this may not be for everybody.)

From C. S. Lewis:

In this chapter I am going to talk about something which may be helpful to some readers, but which may seem to others merely an unnecessary complication. If you are one of the second sort of readers, then I advise you not to bother about this chapter at all but to turn on to the next.

In the last chapter I had to touch on the subject of prayer, and while that is still fresh in your mind and my own, I should like to deal with a difficulty that some people find about the whole idea of prayer. A man put it to me by saying "I can believe in God all right, but what I cannot swallow is the idea of Him attending to several hundred million human beings who are all addressing Him at the same moment." And I have found that quite a lot of people feel this.

Now, the first thing to notice is that the whole sting of it comes in the words at the same moment. Most of us can imagine God attending to any number of applicants if only they came one by one and He had an endless time to do it in. So what is really at the back of this difficulty is the idea of God having to fit too many things into one moment of time.

Well that is of course what happens to us. Our life comes to us moment by moment. One moment disappears before the next comes along: and there is room for very little in each. That is what Time is like. And of course you and I tend to take it for granted that this Time series--this arrangement of past, present and future--is not simply the way life comes to us but the way all things really exist. We tend to assume that the whole universe and God Himself are always moving on from past to future just as we do. But many learned men do not agree with that. It was the Theologians who first started the idea that some things are not in Time at all: later the Philosophers took it over: and now some of the scientists are doing the same.

Almost certainly God is not in Time. His life does not consist of moments following one another. If a million people are praying to Him at ten-thirty tonight, He need not listen to them all in that one little snippet which we call ten-thirty. Ten-thirty--and every other moment from the beginning of the world--is always the Present for Him. If you like to put it that way, He has all eternity in which to listen to the split second of prayer put up by a pilot as his plane crashes in flames.

That is difficult, I know. Let me try to give something, not the same, but a bit like it. Suppose I am writing a novel. I write "Mary laid down her work; next moment came a knock at the door! " For Mary who has to live in the imaginary time of my story there is no interval between putting down the work and hearing the knock. But I, who am Mary's maker, do not live in that imaginary time at all. Between writing the first half of that sentence and the second, I might sit down for three hours and think steadily about Mary. I could think about Mary as if she were the only character in the book and for as long as I pleased, and the hours I spent in doing so would not appear in Mary's time (the time inside the story) at all.

This is not a perfect illustration, of course. But it may give just a glimpse of what I believe to be the truth. God is not hurried along in the Time-stream of this universe any more than an author is hurried along in the imaginary time of his own novel. He has infinite attention to spare for each one of us. He does not have to deal with us in the mass. You are as much alone with Him as if you were the only being He had ever created. When Christ died, He died for you individually just as much as if you had been the only man in the world.

The way in which my illustration breaks down is this. In it the author gets out of one Time-series (that of the novel) only by going into another Time-series (the real one). But God, I believe, does not live in a Time-series at all. His life is not dribbled out moment by moment like ours: with Him it is, so to speak, still 1920 and already 1960. For His life is Himself.

If you picture Time as a straight line along which we have to travel, then you must picture God as the whole page on which the line is drawn. We come to the parts of the line one by one: we have to leave A behind before we get to B, and cannot reach C until we leave B behind. God, from above or outside or all round, contains the whole line, and sees it all.

The idea is worth trying to grasp because it removes some apparent difficulties in Christianity. Before I became a Christian one of my objections was as follows. The Christians said that the eternal God who is everywhere and keeps the whole universe going, once became a human being. Well then, said 1, how did the whole universe keep going while He was a baby, or while He was asleep? How could He at the same time be God who knows everything and also a man asking his disciples "who touched me?" You will notice that the sting lay in the time words: "While He was a baby" --"How could He at the same time?" In other words I was assuming that Christ's life as God was in time, and that His life as the man Jesus in Palestine was a shorter period taken out of that time--just as my service in the army was a shorter period taken out of my total life. And that is how most of us perhaps tend to think about it. We picture God living through a period when His human life was still in the future: then coming to a period when it was present: then going on to a period when He could look back on it as something in the past. But probably these ideas correspond to nothing in the actual facts. You cannot fit Christ's earthly life in Palestine into any time-relations with His life as God beyond all space and time. It is really, I suggest, a timeless truth about God that human nature, and the human experience of weakness and sleep and ignorance, are somehow included in His whole divine life. This human life in God is from our point of view a particular period in the history of our world (from the year A.D. one till the Crucifixion). We therefore imagine it is also a period in the history of God's own existence. But God has no history. He is too completely and utterly real to have one. For, of course, to have a history means losing part of your reality (because it had already slipped away into the past) and not yet having another part (because it is still in the future): in fact having nothing but the tiny little present, which has gone before you can speak about it. God forbid we should think God was like that. Even we may hope not to be always rationed in that way.

Another difficulty we get if we believe God to be in time is this. Everyone who believes in God at all believes that He knows what you and I are going to do tomorrow. But if He knows I am going to do so-and-so, how can I be free to do otherwise? Well, here once again, the difficulty comes from thinking that God is progressing along the Time-line like us: the only difference being that He can see ahead and we cannot. Well, if that were true, if God foresaw our acts, it would be very hard to understand how we could be free not to do them. But suppose God is outside and above the Time-line. In that case, what we call "tomorrow" is visible to Him in just the same way as what we call today." All the days are "Now" for Him. He does not remember you doing things yesterday, He simply sees you doing them: because, though you have lost yesterday, He has not. He does not "foresee" you doing things tomorrow, He simply sees you doing them: because, though tomorrow is not yet there for you, it is for Him. You never supposed that your actions at this moment were any less free because God knows what you are doing. Well, He knows your tomorrow's actions in just the same way--because He is already in tomorrow and can simply watch you. In a sense, He does not know your action tin you have done it: but then the moment at which you have done it is already "Now" for Him.

This idea has helped me a good deal. If it does not help you, leave it alone. It is a "Christian idea" in the sense that great and wise Christians have held it and there is nothing in it contrary to Christianity. But it is not in the Bible or any of the creeds. You can be a perfectly good Christian without accepting it, or indeed without thinking of the matter at all.

(C.S. Lewis, Time And Beyond Time, from Mere Christianity)

The Sacrament of the Present Moment

We have a lot of pain in this life. There is physical pain, like when you throw a bowling ball wrong and have it twist off a piece of your fingernail; and emotional pain, like when you feel alone or fearful; and mental pain, like when you fear the physical or emotional pain that is to come; and sometimes all of them at once, like when you have to go to the dentist.

We have a lot of reasons to worry and to think about our future, where our lives will lead us. This comes naturally to us. Scientists are now telling us that our brains are primarily designed to predict the future.

Ps. 118:24 reads - "This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Increasingly, I find this scripture to be important. It's a motif found throughout the Bible. Like...

* Today is the day of salvation...
* Now is the time to worship...
* This is the day the Lord has made...

Arguably, this moment... right now... is the moment of all moments. It is not to be avoided (as if we could) or gotten-past because we are on to better things. I like how Greg Boyd puts this:

"God is the God of the living, not the God of the already-past or the not-yet-present. He's the great "I AM," not the great "I was" or the great "I will be." He's been present for every moment in the past, for which we can be thankful, and he'll be present at every moment in the future, which gives us great hope. But he's only alive and active now, in the present - which is the only thing that's real." (Present Perfect: Finding God in the Now, 15)

Now, for example, God loves you. This core Jesus-truth is meant to be not a mere theoretical truth but an experiential reality. This is cool because it is experience, not theory, that breeds conviction. So right now, "remind yourself that you are submerged in God's love." (Ib., 19) Dwell with God who makes his dwelling place in you 24/7. God is in the house of "you" right now. Why not say "Hi?"

Those who practice attending to God in every now-moment are the ones who will do great things for God in the future. Non-attendance now means failure tomorrow. And, God could grant one of those watershed-life-changing now-moments... now. Read history to verify the truth of this last statement. Therefore attend. Raise your hand and say "Present, Lord."

Boyd says that "now is where God lives." (Ib., 21) Missionary Frank Laubach encourages us to "Make a new beginning." Boyd writes: "Wake up to God's presence in this moment now." 17th-century monk Jean-Pierre de Caussade called this "the sacrament of the present moment." We attend to God now so we can know God now, and so we can be different in the next moment.

Speaking for myself personally, I am a wuss when it comes to physical pain, and I'm a sucker for emotional pain, and I put a lot of mental pain on myself. The devil likes to try to steal my joy whenever I let him. Yesterday, I was driving home with a sore thumb after a terrific weekend. I was joyful, and listening to worship music. Yet my praises were not enough to keep the devil away, to prevent him from reminding me of what I do not have, of placing a pang of emotional hurt into my heart. He knows that that will trigger my mind into overdrive, and I'll start that slow spiral into self-induced pity and panic by overthinking a situation. It was a perfectly designed trap for me on all three levels of pain. And all three were lies.

That's right, devil, it didn't work that time, did it? I hope my spoken Word of God and subsequent loud praises sent you running in pain yourself. "Rejoice in the Lord always, and again I say, Rejoice!" (Phil. 4:4). God is with me now. He doesn't leave me alone to go prepare my future - He stays beside me to work on my present.

So the next time you are sitting in the dentist's chair (literally or metaphorically) and the oral surgeon is about to drill and tells you, "You'll now feel some vibration," do not decide to just to hang on and long for this particular now-experience to be over. I don't believe that God says, in that moment, "Excuse me, I'll be back when the tooth is out." Instead, my ever-present God suggests that it would be good to take this time to pray for some other people that He has on His mind, and that now would be a good time since you have nothing else to do. So, fight the enemy by praying for some specific friends that you care for very much.

If you are like me, you need God now and not in some distant future. And while it is very good to recount our past experiences with God, it is better to experience God now. God is not like some person we used to live with but is no longer with us. Nor is God living in some far-off land but making plans to visit us in a few years. God calls himself "Emmanuel." God with us. God with you. In the now.

Thy Will

Teach me to feel that Thou art always nigh;
Teach me the struggles of the soul to bear -
To check the rising doubt, the rebel sigh;
Teach me the patience of unanswered prayer.

Does the fact that I cannot forget indicate that God does not want me to, or is it my own unwillingness to forget that has kept God from answering my prayer to that end?

Or does He want me to remember - to "suffer me to hunger" so that I might the more fully learn to find all my satisfaction in Him?

Can it be that by a show of what Paul called "will worship" I should crush the bud of a flower of God's creation?

I know no prayer for this other than: Thy will be done.

Catch Up

I have a lot of writing to do. There are two Pillars of Faith to talk about from IMPACT, and we just had a Saturday Night. That's in addition to my usual rambling theological thoughts. If I actually have any readers out there - I thank the both of you, ha ha - expect a fair number of posts to appear soon.

EDIT - Yeah... until finals week goes away, this blog is officially on hiatus. I'll see you on the other side of half-dead!

The Pillar of Prayer - IMPACT April '10

There was an IMPACT meeting last weekend. For those of you who are unaware what that is, roughly once a month we hold a Christian overnight retreat outside of Stroud, OK. A message is brought by Tonderai, lessons are taught by various college-aged Christians, worship and prayer abounds, and we all have a good time playing games and eating deliciously-prepared foods, too.

This time, Tonderai gave us five pillars of Christianity that hold up our faith and lives in Jesus. I want to summarize each pillar here, in my own words. I will be doing one at a time, in no particular order. None of these pillars are more important than any other; all need to be equally strong to fully support your Christian walk.

The first pillar is prayer. Prayer is communication with God. In the same sense that you can carry on a conversation with your friends, your teachers, your parents, or a total stranger, so can you carry on a conversation with God. When you talk to and with God, you are praying. Sometimes you have light conversation with your friends, over the phone or while driving in the car or in passing at school. Thus, simply saying a few words with God periodically throughout your day is prayer. Sometimes, though, you have deep and serious conversations with friends, where the two of you sit down over coffee or the like, face to face, and work through some issue. In the same way, there are occasions to get alone with God and have a serious conversation with Him. This, too, is prayer.

That being said, the most common use of prayer is requesting help from God. There is nothing wrong with doing this. Hebrews 11:6 states, "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him." A central part of Christianity is that we should come to Him with our needs and desires, with the knowledge and faith that God will answer our prayers.

But why aren't all of our prayers answered? I can provide two reasons from the Bible.

The first is that God's answers come as long as we remain in Him. In other words, we must be seeking Him with all of our heart ("He rewards those who earnestly seek Him"). As we do so, we will learn to hear and know God's will, and our prayers will grow to be aligned with His will. I won't say that God will NOT answer a prayer that is contrary to His will for us, but we would still be stepping out of faith to ask for that prayer. Also, a part of remaining in God is continuing to repent of any sins that may hinder our hearing of His answer. Isaiah 59:1-2 states, "Surely the arm of the LORD is not too short to save, nor His ear too dull to hear. But your iniquities have separated you from your God; your sins have hidden His face from you, so that He will not hear." God will not refuse to answer us - His promises state His answer will come - but by sinning and turning from God's will, we stop listening. Many of God's answers require faith on our part to come about; if we are willfully disobeying God and not listening to Him, we will not do whatever it is God asks of us to receive the answer!

The second reason is that we tend to give up. We lose our faith. We do not receive an answer immediately, or within the time frame we desire, and so we assume it has gone unanswered. This cannot be. God has promised He will answer, and "God is not a man, that He should lie, nor a son of man, that He should change His mind" (Numbers 23:19). We must accept the answer to our prayer in faith, believing that it WILL come. In the meantime, we get on with serving God, with seeking Him (as per the first reason above). 1 Thessalonians 5:17 urges us to "pray without ceasing." In other words, don't give up!

Tonderai gave us something to remember this with: the acronym PUSH. When you or someone you know is faltering in their faith for a prayer, tell them to PUSH through, to Pray Until Something Happens! Do not give up until God makes something happen!

There was one other thing touched on during Tonderai's message. Sometimes, we feel the tugging in our hearts that someone or something is in need of our prayer, but we do not know what it is. Or perhaps we have a need or desire and in our minds we think we know what would be the answer... but this may not be what God has in store for the answer. If we do not know exactly what to pray for, Paul gives us advice in Romans 8:25-27.

But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will.

This, to me, is a way of using the Spirit to pray. There are a few ways this "groaning" might be expressed, though. In the Old Testament, both Hannah and David experienced times where all they could do was cry out to God. They were in need and didn't know what to pray for, but their spirit connected with God's Spirit and moved Him to act. Paul speaks of using the Holy Spirit to speak in tongues as a way of "edifying the self." How would that edify and strengthen our spirits if not as a prayer directly to God that we simply cannot understand because we do not know what to pray for? The "groaning" may be the Holy Spirit directing us to some action that we need to take to receive the answer to the prayer we are unaware of. If you feel a desire to pray for someone, but you aren't sure who or what to say, do NOT doubt the urging! Act on it. You may receive further direction at that point, or you may walk away feeling as though you did nothing. Either way, you were faithful in a "small thing," and you will learn to trust God more and more when the Spirit moves you so that you will be ready to be faithful when trusted "with much."

In summary, prayer is talking with God. You can do this walking down the sidewalk or closeted in your room. Many prayers involve asking God for something, and God expects this because He wants you to rely on Him for your every need. All of your answers should ideally come from or be confirmed by God. To see answers to your prayers, seek God's will and do what you know is right to do, and do not give up. Find the Biblical promises and stand on them despite current circumstances. And always remember to act on whatever urgings the Holy Spirit places inside of you; God will meet your faith and make things happen!

The Definition of Sin

I'm reading a number of books right now (you can see them on the sidebar to the right). A running theme that has been popping up in my prayer and reading for the last few weeks has been the definition of sin. By that I mean that my understanding of what constitutes sin has... well, not really "changed" so much as "improved." I have a deeper understanding of it now, I think. Sin is simply any act outside of God's will; to put it another way, the absence of God's will in your life is sin.

We are all taught in church that everyone is born into sin, thanks to that original sin by Adam.

"For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23)

"For since death came through a man, the resurrection of the dead comes also through a man. For as in Adam all die, so in Christ all will be made alive." (1 Corinthians 15:21-22).

This is a true statement. However, it gives the impression of some innate disease that rots us from the inside out regardless of what we do, that we are hapless victims. This, too, is true, but it goes deeper than this. It is true that we are victims to sin, that death is the inevitable consequence of sin, and that our only hope is Jesus Christ dying for our sins. We can't do it alone.

"For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." (Romans 6:23)

The wages of sin are death. A wage is something you earn. Thus, it isn't that you are "cursed" with sin immediately because you were born. And this isn't anything novel. We all come to Christ knowing that we're sinners, that we've done "wrong," and that we need forgiveness for this. But what is it that you consider the wrongness in your life in need of repentance?

I would wager that many of us look to the laws and rules in the Bible to measure our actions. The Ten Commandments are a prime example. The two commandments given by Jesus, love God with all of your heart and love your neighbor as yourself. Whenever we fail to live up to these standards, we say we have sinned and we ask for forgiveness. As we should. The Law given by God is the perfect standard, because it represents walking entirely in God's will. And none of us can do that, at least not on our own. Jesus was the only One able to walk perfectly in God's will, and He is the only One who can help us do the same.

I'm in danger of becoming side-tracked in talking about how the Law, its purpose, and how it is fulfilled in Christ. That is not the point of this entry. The point I'm trying to make with the above paragraph is that Jesus said He came to fulfill the Law, and that if we love Him we will follow the Law despite no longer being under it. The Law represents walking entirely in God's will, and the Law makes us aware of how far we fall short of God's will. Simply breaking the Law doesn't equate to sin, in the same sense that simply following the Law doesn't equate to righteousness.

The sin is walking outside of God's will; righteousness is walking within God's will. If you are walking in God's will, you will be obeying the commandments by default. That is why Jesus said the first priority is to love the Lord your God with all of your heart -- if you do this, the rest will follow.

Here is where my eyes were opened up a little more. Living a moral life - judging between right and wrong and choosing right - isn't enough to be free of sin. In other words, you can still do all of that and be walking outside of God's will. God has an unique calling for each of us, a predetermined path specially designed for you and I. Any time we step off of that path, we're sinning. That's a hard truth. That's why Jesus calls us to commit ourselves to Him fully. If we aren't running the race 100%, all-in for Jesus, we risk stepping off of the path. Paul warned us of this. Rob Bell, in Velvet Elvis, puts it a different way.

"... let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith..." (Hebrews 12:1-2)

"Your job is the relentless pursuit of who God made you to be. And anything else you do is sin and you need to repent of it." Rob Bell, Velvet Elvis)

When we step off of the path, we open ourselves first to sin, and then to the curse of God for sin (as opposed to His shelter of blessings when we walk in righteousness), and finally to the snares and attacks of the devil. Believe it or not, our lives are easiest managed when we do the very hard thing of committing everything we have and all of our actions to Jesus. See my entry on Perfection - His burden really is light! When we start seeking Him with all of our hearts, we find Him, and He takes care of us. At that point, the only thing we have to worry about is pleasing God. Wouldn't that be nice? To only have ONE thing to worry about, ever? To never give another care to bills, or relationships, or sickness, or hunger? To know that all of our needs - and through us the needs of our loved ones and everyone around us - are met by God because we're walking in true faith and obedience to Him?

I write this not only because I find it important for myself to be reminded that simply living a good life is still sinful, to remind myself that I must seek God's Word and direction in my life and then follow wherever they lead me, but also because my heart breaks for many of my friends who are living in sin. And I'm not just talking about those who are unsaved. I know to pray for them by default. I'm talking about the friends I have who believe in Jesus, have asked Him to be ruler of their lives and try to live following the Law, but aren't letting Jesus really work at them from the inside. I have friends who live with their unmarried partners, friends who only think about God on Sundays, friends who half-heartedly seek God and half-heartedly cling to their own will in life. I don't lay any judgment on any particular friend -- I'm the world's worst at not acting when God calls me to act, and even if I weren't, I don't know the private dialogue between Jesus and them. But before, I always thought it sad but not life-threatening; they were Christians, doing their best to not sin, but simply not enjoying all of the benefits of a deeper relationship with Christ. Now, though, I recognize it for what it is: not seeking God with everything in you, not running the race to whatever extreme God wants you in, is sin. They may be willfully rejecting God's call for their lives, and not realizing it is sin to do so! And this makes me want to cry. I understand now why David asked the Lord to forgive Him his hidden faults as well as his willful sins, and why Jesus cried out for forgiveness of those who had not repented because they didn't know they were sinning (but still were!):

"Who can discern his errors? Forgive my hidden faults. Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me." (Psalms 19:12-13)

"Jesus said, 'Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.'" (Luke 23:34)

Their unknown sin may also be playing a part in unanswered prayers, which is tragic. I'm not going to jump into this now, having gone on more than long enough already, but sin in your life can contribute to unanswered prayer. I don't think that God ignores those who pray with sin, nor do I think that He won't answer when it is in His will to do so, but the promise of receiving "anything we ask" of Jesus is likely blocked by sin. Obviously we all struggle with sinning - I do daily - but unrepented sin, sinful areas not given over to Jesus for improvement, block the prerequisite to getting what we ask for.

"Surely the arm of the LORD is not too short to save, nor His ear too dull to hear. But your iniquities have separated you from your God; your sins have hidden His face from you, so that He will not hear." (Isaiah 59:1-2)

"If you remain in Me and My Words remain in You, ask for whatever you want and it will be done for you." (John 15:7)

So, to summarize, sin entered the world through Adam and Eve when they stepped out of God's will. Since then, none of us have been able to walk that perfect path within God's will. Until Jesus came along. Through His perfect life and subsequent death and resurrection, He provided the way for His Spirit to enter our spirits and change us from the inside-out, to model His behavior and finally be able to walk in God's perfect will.

In the same way that darkness is the absence of light, and cold the absence of heat, sin is the absence of God's will. Giving anything less than 100% is sin. We all sin and fall short of God's will, but each time we do, as long as we are faithful to come to Jesus in repentance and give over that part of our lives to Him, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from the unrighteousness, to help maneuver us back onto God's path and will. Search out God with all of your heart, seeking the areas where you might be holding back, and God will be faithful in shaping them anew, better.

Jars of Oil - February's Saturday Night Message

This last weekend was Saturday Night. For anyone who is unaware of what that is, once a month we have a get-together in Edmond for local Christians. The night includes some social time, a short sermon or Biblical discussion, and a period of praise, worship, and prayer for each other. Saturday Nights are always amazing, filled with the power of God, and this weekend was no exception. Tonderai brought a very wise message from the Bible, and I'd like to share the gist of it to anyone who reads this and couldn't make it. Obviously, this isn't my message and I won't be covering all of it, but I will go over the points that spoke to me.

The message came from 2 Kings 4:1-7.

The wife of a man from the company of the prophets cried out to Elisha, "Your servant my husband is dead, and you know that he revered the LORD. But now his creditor is coming to take my two boys as his slaves."

Elisha replied to her, "How can I help you? Tell me, what do you have in your house?"

"Your servant has nothing there at all," she said, "except a little oil."

Elisha said, "Go around and ask all your neighbors for empty jars. Don't ask for just a few. Then go inside and shut the door behind you and your sons. Pour oil into all the jars, and as each is filled, put it to one side."

She left him and afterward shut the door behind her and her sons. They brought the jars to her and she kept pouring. When all the jars were full, she said to her son, "Bring me another one." But he replied, "There is not a jar left." Then the oil stopped flowing.

She went and told the man of God, and he said, "Go, sell the oil and pay your debts. You and your sons can live on what is left."

The first thing to be noted here is that the woman was honest with the issues in her life. Tonderai spoke of our culture's tendency to put a positive spin on everything. Daily we encounter people who ask a variation of this general greeting, "Hey man, how are you today?" We typically respond positively, "I'm doing great, thanks!" regardless of how we may actually be feeling. Even amongst our fellow Christians, we tend to put up a positive façade. And even if we do share some of what is troubling us, we try to make it look like we're handling it. "Well, things have been rough, but God is faithful."

We don't dare be completely honest, for a multitude of reasons. It could be considered rude, or we don't want to burden our friends with our troubles, or we might be seen as weak or incapable or needy, or they will think less of us, or whatever. Tonderai's point was we tend to have an image we want people to see us as, and so we only answer in ways that support that image.

However, in doing this, we separate ourselves from the help they could provide. We put ourselves in precisely the situation that Satan wants us in: alone. When we are alone, He can come at us in full strength. Together, we can use each other's strengths and wisdom to overcome his attacks. Jesus clearly intended for His followers, His church, to work together, to support each other.

For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith. For as we have many members in one body, but all the members do not have the same function, so we, being many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another. (Romans 12:3-5)

The woman in 2 Kings went to Elisha, a man of God, and didn't sugarcoat her problems. Note that her husband was a man of God as well. He served the prophets faithfully. But she didn't talk about his virtues; she said he left debt, and I now have a problem! She laid it all out to Elisha, explaining that she had nothing, and her boys were about to be made slaves. She needed help!

Another thing to note is that she went to the person she knew could provide help, a man of God. If there is anyone we should be honest with, it is those we know are in touch with God and can help us discern His will. We tend to be ashamed to say how worse off we are then them, but that is foolish. They are precisely the people who will NOT judge us, who will be ready to jump to our aid through the love of Christ in them. We as Christian brethren go through different trials and lessons in life. One point that was made during Saturday Night was that, in going to others for help, we acquire their experience and wisdom. I may have spent ten years overcoming some weakness, some challenge and lesson from God. Through that experience, I know God's will in that specific area. If you're starting to go through that same problem, you can benefit from my experience and save yourself ten years of tribulation. But you've got to be honest first so I know what you're going through. That is how we are set up to work; none of us are strong everywhere, all the time, but each of us are strong in some area at some time, and together we can grow much quicker than apart.

A wise man will hear and increase in learning, and a man of understanding will acquire wise counsel (Proverbs 1:5).

Where there is no counsel, the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety (Proverbs 11:14).

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but he who heeds counsel is wise (Proverbs 12:15).

So, we know that the woman in 2 Kings had to face her problems in order to even hope to overcome them, and so must we. We must be honest with ourselves, honest with our Christian friends and elders who can help, and honest in our prayers to God. Let's move on.

Once the woman gave her story to Elisha, he asked her a question: "What do you have?" She replied, "I have nothing, except this small bit of oil." In her eyes, that bit of oil was essentially useless. It wouldn't solve her problem. But it was a starting point for God. If you want to find an answer from God, if you want to move out of your situation, you should take inventory of what you have. Once again, be honest with yourself. You have gifts and strengths from the Lord, even if you cannot see how they would help.

(Sidenote - Tonderai spoke of a SWOT analysis, something he undergoes periodically when he is in tribulation. A SWOT analysis consists of discovering your: Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats. Such a self-inventory could be useful in figuring out what you have to offer to God, what is hindering you, and what direction you could go in.)

So, now the woman and Elisha are on the same page. They both know the problem, and what the woman has to offer to God. Elisha's suggestion, though, seems counter-intuitive. He tells her to go borrow all the jars she can find. Did you catch that? Her problem is she is in debt, and his solution is to go borrow. Borrowing is not typically how you get out of debt; in fact, it tends to make the problem worse.

The point is that God's solutions will always require faith. Once you pray and discern God's will, it will require that you step out on faith. It will not make sense to you; the ways of God look like foolishness to man. But that is what faith is: hearing God's will, and choosing to follow it regardless. The woman heard God's will, and chose to follow regardless of how wise it sounded because she trusted it was from God.

The requirement of faith by God to act serves a purpose: it increases your capacity to believe. This was the heart of Tonderai's message.

Once you have faced a problem, heard God's will and acted on faith to receive the solution to the problem, your belief in God's ability to provide has now increased. Before you had the solution, you were worried about the problem. The woman was afraid her children were going to be made slaves, and she didn't see a way out. After the events with Elisha, her faith is increased. She now knows without a doubt that God provides, and she can share that faith with others facing problems. And now we get back to our role in helping other Christians with our experiences.

Your capacity for God's blessings is up to you. Once the woman had collected the jars - acted on faith - she began to pour her oil into them. She kept pouring until there were no more jars, and at that point, the oil stopped. The man of God told the woman to gather as many jars as she could. Had she only gathered one or two, she only would have filled up one or two jars. Had she gathered a hundred, she would have filled a hundred. Her level of faith was the only thing that decided how blessed she was. When God calls you to do something, give everything to Him. Go all out. He'll pay you back to the measure of your faith.

One final point. Once the jars were filled, she went back to Elisha and he told her to do two things: sell the oil and pay back the debt, and THEN use the rest for herself.

The woman started out in debt. God first provided for her to come up to stability. Then He moved her on to prosperity.

You cannot be in prosperity, able to bless others with your experience and blessings, until you are out of your problem and stable. In other words, God will first provide for your problem, meet your needs. Then He will give you overabundance so that you provide for others' needs. Elisha was prosperous. His needs had been met, and so he was in a position to meet the needs of others, like this woman. He had the faith required, not a deficit.

Do you want a solution to the problems and stresses in your life? Do you want to be prosperous? Go to a Christian who has already overcome the problem you're facing, who has the abundance of faith in that specific area to provide for you. Share your problems with your Christian family, and you'll find the answer so much quicker. And then you'll have the faith to answer for others. Look for people with stability and prosperity in order to leave debt.